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March 01, 2004
Meyer's Law of Female Thermodynamics
The Law:
T(w) = 1/[M(c)]
The temperature that a woman feels is inversely proportional to the amount of clothing she wears. In other words, the more clothing a girl wears the colder she will feel, whereas the less clothing a girl wears the more comfortable she will feel. Women do not feel heat; a woman knows only two temperatures: freezing cold, and OK.
The Proof:
Just look around you. If you are a guy, compare the clothes you are wearing to the clothes the girls around you are wearing. If you're a girl, compare your clothes to the men that you see.
Here in Florida, it is a very comfortable 76 degrees Farenheit. I wear shorts and a short sleeved t-shirt. Every man at this school is wearing a short sleeved shirt of some kind and either shorts or long pants. Comfortable clothing for this kind of weather. The women, however, are practically wearing snowsuits. 95% of the girls here are wearing sweaters over shirts and long pants. 50% are wearing coats over that. 10% are wearing wool scarves.
AND EVERY LAST ONE IS FREEZING HER ASS OFF!
I don't understand this. For some reason, girls can put on thicker layers of clothing than a walrus' pelt and still whine about the cold weather even on the sunniest days of the year, while on these same days the same girls could go to the beach and sunbathe wearing nothing but dental floss attached to fabric samples and whine about how there are no cute guys around. Today I was in painting class wearing my shorts and t-shirt. The air-conditioning must have been broken because it was boiling hot in thre. So hot that I actually began to sweat, and believe you me, it takes a LOT of heat to make me sweat. Still, every girl in that class had a sweater or a wool jacket on and would not take it off. All this, and the nude model didn't have a problem with the heat. She was comfortably lying in the buff, not a goosebump on her body, and when the teacher asked if she wanted a heater, she said that she was plenty warm. Later at lunch, I swear all the girls in the cafeteria were dressed to go cross-country skiing and all the guys were dressed for 76 degree weather.
I'm sorry if this paints an unfair picture of women. I have nothing but respect for you. But Jesus-Tap-Dancing-Christ, you have the same skin as the other half of the human population, why are you always so damn cold?
Look, I know that it gets colder in the morning and in the night so there is a need to dress warmly or bring a jacket. All I'm saying is that from 10 am to sunset it gets pretty hot and there is no need to walk around and announce how freezing cold you are when it's one of the most beautiful days of the year.
Ladies, take off the jacket and sweater and actually feel the air with your skin. You might be pleasantly surprised.
Posted by dminky at March 1, 2004 01:20 PM
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Comments
I love your Ma Fratelli! Stylized, yet realistic. If you ever sell it, I would like to buy it, as long as I can comission you to paint three more: her sons, of course, each done in a different style. An impressionist Jake Fratelli, an expressionist Francis Fratelli, a cubist Sloth Fratelli. That last one will be easiest, of course - just draw a normal face.
bj
Posted by: bj at March 3, 2004 05:25 AM